do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Fact: my bamboo plant has grown 2 & 1/2 inches since I started watering it with bong water
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
me and my mom are sitting in the bank parking lot drying my beer soaked check with the heat... the whole car smells like heinekin and I'm trying to convince her I don't need a.a.
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Why is there a slipper full of piss in my bedroom?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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