I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
If I could run through a field of Reece's and Oreos, dive off a milkfall into a bowl of cereal. My Life would complete.
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently he got pepper spray on his dick. So he's a literal fire crotch.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I didn't think you wanted your identity stolen along with your dignity. My mistake.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize