Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
my mom just emptied my water bottle filled with vodka into the turtle tank.
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
whose ass print is on the piano?
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I'm sorry but if you can't drink a bottle of wine without a glass, I do not think we can be friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
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