NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
