I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
