At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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