Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
