She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
I'm ordering a large vanilla ice cream with rainbow sprinkles so when I vom tonight it will look like lisa frank dolphins in acid trip colors
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
I am one with the molecules
Randomize
