I am in a vortex of obligation.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
At one point I believe I was despencing medical advice while wearing a sombrero and a hulk hand
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
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