You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
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