Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Someone just asked me if I was chewing red hot gum.... I'm LITERALLY SWEATING OUT FIREBALL.
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
