You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
I'm like cupid
You're a whore with a bow and arrow
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
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