Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Having a conversation over beer pong about a threesome I participated in...it's only Wednesday
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
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