Is it normal to miss your booty call?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
you're the only person i know to use "jizz" and "cute" in the same sentence.
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize