So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
