I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
At what point were we discussing suction-cupping a dildo to the wall?
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
That was an excessively violent trivia night
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
