All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
Randomize
