New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
im a genious. moved my bed and mirror so i can watch the game while Fucking
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
One of my nipples looks nothing like the other...i don't know how this happened
Randomize