Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
They should make a Rosetta Stone that allows men to understand what the fuck women are actually trying to say.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
What's a quick way to get over an ex-boyfriend? To hear about how he threw up in a cup and then drank it. That's how.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
