"it" just moved
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
