i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
It's not meant to be. I also just shot a turkey baster of gin into Nate's eye, so....
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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