I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
We still getting married? Or were you day drinking
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