Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
