i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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