im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
this boner is exhausting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
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