Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
