ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
ASIANS HAVE SEX TOO!! I just watched it happen in the library.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
