His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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