One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
5 am booty call.. And I went I need to gain better control of my vagina
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I forgot wine drunk hurts
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
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