nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Within 24 hours, I went to a feminist documentary screening with two state reps and you hate fucked a rent-a-cop on the helipad of your hospital. Somewhere our lives went in different directions.
I still make more money.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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