you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
i just had a pap smear and two shots. lets hit the beach.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
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