I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
I THINK HE DOES. OMG!!!!! OMG I FUCKED A GUY W A FAKE LEG AND I DIDN'T EVEN KNOW!!!!!!????!!!!!!!!!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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