no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
Note to self: never do anything I don't want to explain to a paramedic
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
A drunk hobo just gave me a fist bump. Because I know what a womb is.
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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