yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I'm going to let the use of the word "hella" slide considering I have sperm older than you.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
He paid for a 5 star hotel suite and I raided the mini bar after he left. I think that’s bad karma. Want some pringles?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Randomize
