will power is for people who don't want to get laid
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
Hey! I was tired. I threw up in two parking lots yesterday.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
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