we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I'm so stoned I just sat here for like at least 45 min thinking about how I would get some jack in the box tacos if only I knew where my wallet was and then I kind of blinked and finally noticed I had literally been staring at my wallet the ENTIRE fucking time
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
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