is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
The cleaning lady even cleaned my bong. I'm scared to open my sex toy drawer and see if and how she organized it
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
I can't believe you guys got into a sword fight over a chicken nugget
Oh, so that's where all the scratches came from...
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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