i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
just found a piece of pizza in my dresser.....i remember you saying you were going to save one for later so i'm assuming this is your doing
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
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