so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
His words said "save me", but his penis said "I'll take my chances"
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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