My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes