dear life, i get it, drinking is not a contest
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Randomize
