You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
