After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
i now understand why vodka
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
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