16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
