wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
so apparently telling her she could shit easier and therefore lose weight faster wasn't the best arguement for getting anal.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
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