i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I just slapped my cat in the face with my dildo. You were the only one I could tell.
He probs deserved it.
Every good man does.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
