There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
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