Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
was that the third sophomore you've banged this week?
third one in three days
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
