So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
I'm currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
just to let you know, that was probably the funniest text i've ever received.
I suppose that kind of helps fill the void where my self respect used to be.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
