i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I don't know who the girl crying at my kitchen table eating gravy from the KFC container is, but I feel like she could be my soulmate
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Yeah. Still not happy that my prof saw a picture of my vag.
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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