haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
my mom noticed the "toothpaste" stain on my tshirt...she repeatedly attempted to get it off by licking her thumb and rubbing it. See Jenn it obviously doesnt taste that bad...
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
Hey so summary of last night. I threw up in a rain boot then tipped it over on my bed, did my laundry and passed the fuck out. I feel like I didn't see you.
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
I like being woken up by phone calls of you sabotaging marriages
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Randomize
